Celebrating and Supporting Sisterhood

Michelle Matthias

 

March is Women’s History Month – A Tribute to the Ladies

 

We live in a world that is fast-paced, driven, and for some – isolating. Even though we are connected through numerous virtual platforms to everything and everyone far and near, that type of connection is too often superficial and triggers loneliness rather than curb it.

 

I received a beautiful and encouraging message of thanks from someone, acknowledging that the month of March is being celebrated as Women’s History Month. It was very uplifting and encouraging to be recognized for my contribution to others via this blog.

 

This made me realize that I had this unique opportunity to lift up others with my words, with a special focus on my sisters today. I feel truly blessed for having supportive women in my life and I can say that your feedback pushes me to continue to tap into my purpose.

 

In recognition of Women’s History Month I wanted to remind us, ladies, that we are special, we are influential, we are valuable, we are courageous, we are warriors, yes most times we are the prayer warriors.

 

Today’s blog is not about women’s rights. It’s not about women against men. This is not about strong women or weak women. This is about all women. This is about support. This is about reminding my sisters that you are enough just as you are. When women support each other a platform is set for great things to happen. There is room for all of us to shine if we collectively and collaboratively focus on supporting each other rather than getting distracted with comparison and competition.

 

It is important that we do not buy into the strategy that to succeed we must marginalize others. That’s a setup for separation, division, and loneliness and that’s a recipe for failure that’s often felt in the C-suite.

 

It is essential that we create room to talk not only about the achievements and success stories but also about the challenges that women face at home and in the workplace, as we balance personal and professional life.

 

Yes, it takes time and care to develop trusting relationships with each other. It takes care to try to bridge some of our differences. But the effort of understanding each other’s experiences is worth it.

 

Most women are naturally caring and compassionate. It is a natural part of women’s nature to be interdependent, cooperative, and collaborative. It’s innate in most women to foster connections through conversations.

 

While we love our families, our spouses, and our children, there are unique benefits when women support each other. When women support and validate other women personally and professionally:

 

• We forge friendships and a sense of belonging

• We grow in confidence. When we are confident we feel more secure and generally happier

• We feel less alone in our individual struggles and better able to cope in the face of challenges

• We create communication lines with improved flow of information

• We act as a sounding board which helps to relieve tension and anxiety

• We realize that we are unique but our challenges are often similar and not specific to only us

• Sharing reassures us that though we may face challenges, we are not alone.

 

Of course, the list of benefits to women supporting women can go on and on forever.

 

To all the women reading this – you are phenomenal just as you are!

 

 

I will give thanks to Thee, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Thy works, And my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

 

You are as strong as your support system. – Michelle Matthias

 

 

Leveraging Personal Strengths for Growth

Michelle Matthias

 

What does it mean to leverage your strengths?

 

Leveraging your strengths means using what you are personally good at to get more of what you want. (As for how to use them, what they are, well that is a little more complicated.)

 

I would like to place some emphasis on the word ‘strengths’ because while growing up I was pushed to place more effort in the areas where I was weak as opposed to giving more attention to the things that I was naturally good at and preferred doing. I am not saying that the concept is wrong. It is good to challenge yourself and broaden your repertoire but in this blog, my focus is on leveraging our strengths, talents, skills, and abilities to maximize our growth. It’s identifying what you are good at and becoming a master at it while utilizing other people’s help in areas where they are better than us.

 

It is a fact that everyone will experience varying degrees of success and failure during their life. Sometimes, the process of accomplishing and making it to the top can be a jaded walk. One in which you take a few steps forward and more than a few backward, much to your dismay.

 

So the question is: How can I maximize and increase my growth potential and elevate my chances to succeed?

 

The key factor is identifying and leveraging your personal strengths.

You may not know what your personal strengths are, so how are you to go about leveraging them?

 

You first need to pinpoint your strengths and can do so by following these tips:

 

• Get to know Yourself. What are you good at? What are your skillsets, strengths, weaknesses? What concrete skills and abilities do you have? What areas do you excel in and what are your weak areas?

 

• Turn to a Friend/Family. Ask someone who you trust to tell you what are some things they know that you are really good at/your strengths. In some cases, others know you better than you know yourself. Our friends/family have the inside scoop. They know our personality and are often equipped to help us identify our strengths and weaknesses because they have a valuable outsider perspective.

 

• It’s probably a good idea to take your own self-assessment, and compare it to your friend/family assessment of you. If there are overlaps, great, if not perhaps you need to scrutinize either your own self-assessment or your friend/family assessment and see if the truth lies somewhere in between the two.

 

• If you still don’t trust the results from the above then you can look into taking a “strength test.” These are designed to help users identify their own strengths with the idea that our own individual biases could have an impact on how we evaluate our own strengths. The test is implemented to help erase those biases.

 

The idea of leveraging your personal strengths in order to maximize your growth is one that we should all consider and aim to pursue. It’s difficult not to be fulfilled using our natural gifts. Part of leveraging is investing in and developing those strengths/gifts. This requires action. If you’re not doing something with your skills and your knowledge, it becomes useless, it stagnates, and you start to feel bad about yourself.

 

What are you good at? How about becoming better at it?

 

If you are ready to identify and leverage your strengths, remember that success does not happen overnight. You as an individual have to work hard to identify your strengths and then work out a way in which to leverage them to your overall benefit and growth. It takes time, so be patient.

 

 

Leveraging your strengths means using what you are personally good at to get more of what you want.   – Michelle Matthias

 

 

The Ripple Effect

Michelle Matthias

 

In simple terms, the ripple effect is another term for the domino effect. Our behavior can have a chain reaction that reaches beyond the boundaries of our imagination.

 

What is your ripple effect as it relates to your behavior, thoughts, and actions?

 

We cannot control the ripples others make but we certainly can control the ripples we make and possibly influence others.

 

Our thoughts and actions are like stones dropped in a pond. They create ripples that travel outward with far-reaching effects. Everything we do and think affects the people in our lives and their reactions, in turn, affect others. Therefore, the choices we make have far-reaching consequences.

 

Each of us carries within us the capacity to change the world in small ways, for better or worse. We can use the principles of the Ripple Effect to examine our actions and their effects.

 

One act of rudeness or aggression can have a devastating rippling effect as it is passed along. Social media has given us a platform to publicly vent our anger with potentially far-reaching effects. The great news is that the ripple effect is also true with kindness.

 

We have seen the ripple effect of kindness displayed in many fast-food drive-thrus. Research shows that acts of kindness have a spiral effect—they keep going, and going, and going. The beauty is that unlike the ripple of anger that spreads fear and bitterness, the ripple of kindness spreads love and compassion.

 

It has been shown that people who witness kind acts are often motivated to perform a kind act themselves. It creates a contagion. One small act of kindness can have a positive life-changing effect on many.

 

I invite you to set your dominoes in motion by starting a ripple effect of kindness. That one person you affect has the potential to affect others. That choice you make can have consequences, far beyond the person who it is aimed at. Before long your ripple will be beyond your imagination with ripples branching out in all directions.

 

These acts can be as simple as paying someone a compliment, allowing someone out in front of you when driving, saying hello or thank you. The best thing is all these gestures are free, and yet they can summon up all the happy chemicals that make us feel good about life.

 

Every day, every one of us has a chance to influence our world and if enough people choose kindness then we could create a ripple so big to tip the balance away from a world of continual conflict to one of mutual co-operation. We all have that power within us by the ripple we choose to create.

 

 

I invite you to set your dominoes in motion by starting a ripple effect of kindness.   – Michelle Matthias

 

 

Steadfast Assurance

Michelle Matthias

 

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

—1 Peter 5:7

 

God’s favor is not limited to weather or to whether …

 

If you are in the Northeast, whether you had plans to be out and about or not, you know that the weather has caused almost all of us to shelter in.

 

There is such warmth and comfort in knowing that God’s faithfulness towards us is constant, regardless of. Many things can grind to a halt because of impending factors but His love is unfailing. We can rest in the steadfast assurance that God’s love transcends our limitations and our perceived impossibilities. There is warmth and assurance in His presence even when bitter cold winds blow around us.

 

Any day can be a good day if we allow His presence to permeate our hearts. So, as you ease into your activities, be sure to make an effort to be steadfastly focused on God. If you have a concern, tell Him. If something troubles you, talk to Him. If you need answers, ask Him. If you need directions, petition Him. If you need guidance, pray to Him. If you are bored, praise Him. If you are healthy and in your right mind, thank Him, praise Him and rejoice in Him!

 

Every moment is precious if you keep your focus on Him!

 

Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, O Lord. They rejoice in your name all day long; they exult in your righteousness.

—Psalm 89:15–16

 

 

“There is such warmth and comfort in knowing that God’s faithfulness towards us is constant, regardless of”.  Michelle Matthias

 

 

The Resilience Factor

Michelle Matthias

 

All strata of society can relate to challenges, stress, and hardship at some point in time.

 

Resilience is your ability to positively cope with and bounce back from stress and adversity. It’s the ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change. It’s the ability not only to return to a previous good condition after faced with challenges but hopefully to even grow through the experience.

 

Resilience is not a fixed state, therefore, you may be more resilient at different times in your life than others. Most importantly, resilience can be learned, practiced, developed, and strengthened. Resilience is not just necessary for basic survival, but also offers a powerful opportunity for enhancing growth and well-being.

 

It’s important to note that the topic of resilience is very multi-dimensional and can be approached based on categories, domains, pillars, skills, types…and also can be reviewed as it relates to communities, workplace, or the individual.

 

My focus is from an individual standpoint with the hope to spur awareness, encourage curiosity and possibly empower us to build our resilience muscles.

 

Why is building resilience important?

Building resilience is important for several reasons; it enables us to develop mechanisms for protection against experiences that could be overwhelming, it helps us to maintain balance in our lives during difficult or stressful periods, and can also protect us from developing some mental health difficulties and issues.

 

How do you build resilience?

The way that you build resilience may be unique to you but I will share what has worked for me and is probably true for most of us.

 

The diagram below by Bounce Back Project captures the essentials that are critical in building personal resilience and that I have utilized.

 

 

This diagram captures some of the leading indicators that are necessary for a person to build resilience. Intentionally enhancing these aspects of one’s life will increase personal resilience and, in turn, bolster the capacity to handle challenges.

 

Self Awareness – get to know yourself. What are your strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, beliefs, motivation, and emotions? What lifts you / what defeats you? What is others’ perception of you? What do you know to be true?

 

Self-care  – means different things to different people. In any case, it requires our active engagement. Daily physical activity, healthy eating, sufficient sleep, and taking time to recover are essential for both short-term and long-term resilience. Taking time to disengage and disconnect from the routine (mental health breaks).

 

Purpose – a recognition that we belong to and serve something bigger than ourselves. We all are created for a purpose. Our resilience is linked to our purpose. Finding what we are passionate about will help us to identify our purpose. Purpose pushes us beyond limiting beliefs. Purpose drives us to get up when challenges push us down. We can find purpose in our faith, family, in our contribution to humanity.

 

Mindfulness/Prayer – the diagram has mindfulness but mindfulness for me is prayer. Let me qualify, that I’m not necessarily hitting mindfulness because it’s scriptural. Mindfulness is about meditation. Nonetheless, when the Bible mentions meditation, it often mentions obedience in the next breath. An example is the Book of Joshua: “This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. If we desire that the words of our mouth and the meditation of our heart will be acceptable in God’s sight, it must be done with the recognition and acknowledgment that our very existence is dependent on Him. Prayer allows us to enter into the presence of God with the awareness that He is not only our Creator; He is our Keeper. Prayer is a state of actively engaging and communing with Christ our inexhaustible source of resilience.

 

Positive Relationships – this is your support system. The people who support and care for us. No man is an island. We were not made to stand alone. We all have a desire to be connected, to belong, to be loved, to be understood. It’s innate for us to want to give and receive love and acceptance. By having positive relationships with others, we are happier and more content. We feel fulfilled and more supported. Positive and supportive relationships help us to feel healthier and build resilience that enables us to rise to challenges because we are not alone.

 

In closing, I encourage you to nurture your resilience by monitoring your internal dialogue; practice self-compassion and self-care, have a forgiving heart, pray without ceasing, be thankful and be grateful and be bold enough to express it, laugh often, and be optimistic and positive….

 

“Keep this Book of Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” Joshua 1:8

 

“Bumps are likely on the best rides; it is not a good reason to abandon the journey.”   Michelle Matthias